Underage Drinking

[lucyloo]

Hi Ladies,:waves:
Just wanted your opinion on this one.
Have just come back from my nephews 16th birthday party. He had aroun 50 friends there, some invited and some just turning up, which seems to be the norm nowadays.:brow:
Now it is hard to tell kids ages these days, most do look older, but being his friends most were around the age of 16. 98% of these kids were drinking.:blink:
I couldn't believe it. And not just sitting on a cruiser or a bottle of light beer, these kids were drinking hard and fast, and obviuosly were out to get drunk.:blink:
I was quite shocked. My eldest is only turning 14 this year, so I hvaen't had anything to do with this kind of thing. Now, I don;t class myself as an old fuddy duddy, but I was struggling with the party, and while we were packing up and leaving, I said to my 14 and 12 year old, 'look around you and look at all the idiots drinking and making fools of themselves, this is what drinking when you are too young too handle it, does to you'.:uhno:
So I am just wondering, am I behind the times, is 16 the new 18?:dk:
By the way, his parents were letting it go on, there own son was drinking as well, they didn't seem to mind at all......:headh:

[July]

I hate alcohol abuse with a passion. I have to say that when I was 16 or 17 I did get drunk a few times. But it didn't really appeal to me iykwim. So I guess it didn't become a problem for me - but it can for so many others! My DH is a binge drinker and in fact alcoholism often runs in families. All the men, and some women, in my DHs family had/have drinking problems. And I mean going back 100 years! It's partly what children see when growing up - when they have drinking parent(s) they grow up thinking that getting drunk is part of normal behaviour for an adult. Hvaing a party = getting drunk. I believe it's sometimes genetic too, especially in certain Indigenous groups like Aboriginals, Maoris, Native Americans etc...

I think it is the norm for a lot of kids that age. It's seen as being cool, that there is more fun when drinking is involved, boosted confidence, dutch courage and all that stuff. It's all crap of course, but they haven't learnt that yet. What is really scary is hearing that some kids have been drinking since they were 10 or 13! The boy across the road from us had a 16th birthday party last year and there ended up being over 100 kids there - most of them were drinking. That party was supervised - get this - by the father of the boy who is a full blown alcoholic who steadily drank his way through a bottle of whisky all through the party! My son (17 at the time) went to the party and I was so proud of him - he didn't feel any need to join in with the drinking.

[Heather]

I don't think the point is "is 16 the new 18"..the point is that there were adults there who refused to take action and actively encouraged the drinking.
What were these people thinking!!

[Cherie]

Totally disagree with the drinking. If it were my kid there would be no party.

[Rachel]

I think that is totally unacceptable! I really do not understand some parents way of thinking and seeing as it was going on at their house and under their supervision means that are liable for the underage drinking and also the consequences of it! I sure wouldn't want to be them if something bad happened to one of the kids attending the party..

[Barbara]

Lucyloo you are not behind the times at all :no: I think it is disgusting that they let that happen. There is no way I would allow it and I would hope that when my boys are that age, they are smart enough to leave it alone. We had a death in the town we live of a young boy who got hold of some essence because the local bottle shops wouldn't serve him alcohol. They found him the next morning laying in the middle of a paddock behind the shopping centre. His poor parents went through hell. They even play a footy match every year in his memory and all the kids know why he died and the risks of what they are doing to their bodies when drinking too young. I know they are curious and want to try it, and it is hard at times to remember that they are only 16-17 but I don't believe they "need" to have it at all. My niece drinks (she has not long turned 17) and her mum knows what I think about it but unless she keeps her at home under lock and key, there really isn't much she can do when she goes out, other than try to trust that she won't go overboard and get into any sort of trouble. The encouragement by some parents though just dumbfounds me :dk:

[Telori]

I refuse to have alcohol at my kids parties...when they turn 18 is when they will be drinkling at their party. But if they are going to drink they cannot invite anyone who under age 'cause I am not being responsible for someone elses child where alcohol is involved (most of Summer's friends are WAY taller than me and the boys are bloody huge!)

I listen to alot of the kids at work talking about parties and going out to night clubs etc...and most of them are only 16...I think the fact they BRAG about drinking and things just proves they are too young to handle it...

That said my girls have had the odd drink with me for new year or my birthday (last year) but I bought them four drinks so they only had two each...and Summer ended up putting her second one back in the fridge.

I also would like to know how these kids can go for DD when they are 17 but NEVER seem to get charged with underage drinking...I thought it was an offence?

[lucyloo]

i don't even know how these kids get the alcohol. Are the parents buying it for them? Honestly the more I think about it, the more I feel sick. And it pisses me off because the SIL and BIL allow it to happen. They want to be the cool parents, and I am the strict one, and she always says to me that my daughter will be the one climbing out the bedroom window. It scares me to look at the young ones, especially at that party, drunk, and think of my own children. It would kill me to know that they were doing that at someones house. They all looked so stupid, and they didn;t give a shit about adults being there, they took over evrything!!

[Heather]

I have encouraged the TT, from an early age, to watch those ghastly US shows "Wild Police Videos" and the like.....I take great pleasure in pointing out to him how silly the drunks look,what dangerous actions they perform and the consequences to themselves and others, from the rescuers to family and friends.

[mummyof3babes]

I have encouraged the TT, from an early age, to watch those ghastly US shows "Wild Police Videos" and the like.....I take great pleasure in pointing out to him how silly the drunks look,what dangerous actions they perform and the consequences to themselves and others, from the rescuers to family and friends.

:hehe: Yes I like those shows sometimes too, sooo funny!!

[Di Nana]

I think this is a hard one and I am pleased my kids are all of age to drink now, although my two girls don't seem to bother that much
But I don't think this is a new thing, I know I was drinking in the weekends at 16 when out with my boyfriend and our crowd and what I am ashamed to say now is we got round in cars and went booze cruising, one thing I have noticed with the young ones that my kids have got round with, they seem to be way more responsible than we ever were about having a sober driver, As for the party's Now that is another story they do seem to be out of control, with gate crashers, drugs and hard booze such as spirits, and being able to get the booze is never an issue, they just get older mates, brothers or fake ID's and sadly there parents supply it to, when I was 16 booze was easy to get you just rung the pub, publican meet you round the back of pub and you paid double for the trouble also could get it this way on a Sunday when pubs were closed
At the school my youngest used to go to they had a school ball, from the age of 16, then after the ball there was an organised after party, now the police were allowing these kids in with six cans of beer or 6 mixers, the police stayed all night at the party as well as a handful of parents and teachers it was held in a hall, with curtiousy coach, bags were searched , and no one was allowed in after a certain time,
we held a school leaving party for my daughter at our house with her form about 40 kids, some parents stayed to help, we have 5 acres, so tents went up, kids that bought there own cars had to hand me the keys when they arrived, everyone stayed I had my brother and my son, my hubby here to supervise, and I continually served food all night, the booze they bought was only allowed to be beer, or mixers and was not supplied by us that was there doing, there were plenty of parents here to help and they were all well behaved and even got stuck in and cleaned up next morning,
Don't get me wrong I don't like seeing teenagers out boozing and out of control, but sometimes it cna be well supervised, like a school leaving party, they are 17 nearly 18 most them and no matter how hard you try to avoid them having a big get together they want it so best to give them one in a safe environment and supervised than them all pissing off and having there own somewhere

[jenr]

You hit the nail on the head Lucy when you said the parents want to be seen as cool! It seems to me that parents are doing a lot to stay in their kids good books? They dont seem to want to upset their little darlings you see it down the shops all the time!
Before I bought my business I worked in a bottle shop for years I would see it all the time parents would come in with their underage kids the kids would point out what they want and the parents would buy it.
I know my DS was drinking before age but he never got alcohol out of me or hubby and he never came home drunk! I never saw him tipsy until his 18th birthday and that was the first time I saw him light up a smoke he never smoked or drank in front of me until then!
I am not saying my kids were angels but why are parents wanting there kids to grow up to quick these days??

[happygirl]

We were drinking at 16 - but we were pretty responsible. No driving, drinking a four pack of stollis was our limit. No racing around in racy clothing etc either. Just a few close friends having a party. It was simple and fun. Even now my partners mates who over 30 - nearing 40 still have to get "wasted" at every chance they get and called me boring for not! I just cant be bothered with the hangover etc and Id rather use my weekends better then lying in bed nursing a sore head!

[Bam]

with an almost 15 yr old I think it so scary - I am determined he won't be having any 'party' till he is 18 and even then that is a maybe.

Kids live by example and even if they see their parents, family and parents friends 'drinking' responsibly you hope they would follow but peer pressure makes them go wild I think. They think it is now the norm.

I don't know what the answer is - I wonder how they can afford it too ?

[miss kiki]

well, here the drinking age is 21, not 18. :yes: so have i drank when i was 16? of course, i drank when i was 15/16 got piss ass drunk, made a total fool of myself, threw up for almost a week straight-alcohol poisoning, and after that i never drank too much. yeah i threw up after that-a few times, but i didn't know my limit then and i really can't even recall the last time i threw up. :yes:
as for the parents-well, to each their own i suppose, but i do think that's very young. :yes:

[redrobyn]

I think it's a disgrace, we know underage kid's are going to drink but we can't encourage drinking to that degree just to keep in with our kid's, what ever happened to responsible parenting, there is a big problem in Melb. at the moment with gang's of drunk teen's bashing and terrorising people it's totally getting out of hand in some area's, teen's are hard enough to control at the best of time's what hope have you got if they are drunk as well.

[joy]

I went to a 21st party last night and there were 2 15ry old girls drinking and eventually got drunk and stupid!It is so scary to think that my 2 boys could go to a party when they are teenagers and be drinking,I'd be so upset,especially at that age!

[jenr]

well, here the drinking age is 21, not 18. :yes: so have i drank when i was 16? of course, i drank when i was 15/16 got piss ass drunk, made a total fool of myself, threw up for almost a week straight-alcohol poisoning, and after that i never drank too much. yeah i threw up after that-a few times, but i didn't know my limit then and i really can't even recall the last time i threw up. :yes:
as for the parents-well, to each their own i suppose, but i do think that's very young. :yes:


Thats the trouble Kiki a lot of our kids wont make it to 21 if they dont write themselves of by doing something stupid while drunk their brains will be frazzled by the age of 21?

[Mad Old Cow]

Lucy you stick to what you think because i think most will agree with you.
it is wrong but what scares me as well is that most kids whether they are drinking at partys or not take along their *so called* party drugs i know of kids that are 14+ that use party drugs as well as the drink & it really scares the hell out of me to think that my Gkids have to grow up yet.
as most of you know our son is into drugs but the funny thing is he does'nt drink & can't stand being around drunks lol (what a hypocrit) .
there are 9 & 10 yr old kids getting drunk & taking drugs
Have to admit that i got drunk a couple times at 16 & i have found out in my DD adult yrs that when her & friend went to the skate bowl at 16 they also had someone go get them their passion wine but!! i was one of those mothers that said "not my daughter" but ofcourse she was right there with them she said they only ever got half a cup each because they only had the money for 1 bottle, i still get embarrassed to think i was so blind but i was'nt alone one of my GF would be right there with me saying the same about her DD who was also with them . & yet i would drop DD off & pick her up but she said as soon as the parents were out of the street they were across the road with their 1 bottle
but i do think the sad thing about today is that the drink is a lot harder as you said Lucy, it wasnt just light beer kids don't think they have had a good time unless they have drank a bottle of burboun on their own & then the mix of drugs etc makes for a very scarey time

[lucyloo]

Its such a hard line to walk. Don't get me wrong I am no prude. I actually remembered a night(sort of) and I was probably 16, nearly 17, we went to a party down at the local river. My first taste of alcohol, and I was blind drunk, vomiting etc. It stopped me drinking for a while after that!!!
My hubby said today, that wouldn't it be better for the kids to be drinking around us in a supervised environment, rather than out at a park, river etc.
On one hand I do agree, yes let the kids have a party at home, with other parents around, but not just bring as much alcohol as you like and get as pissed as you can.
I think thats the other thing that has changed about nowadays, I just couldn't have done that, drink in front of adults, knowing that i was underage, But the kids now, are very confident and couldn't give a hoot. They certainately weren't hiding the fact.
i wonder what would happen if the police turned up at the party and saw all the underage drinkers. Does it come back to the owners of the house??

[Heather]

I'd also like to know who supplied these youngsters the alcohol?

[miss kiki]

i'm also surprised that these parents didn't take any action when these kids were drinking..it's beginning to be a sad world where parties have to be all about alcohol. i also agree with what rachel said..these parents are liable for all these kids and if something happened to them, they'd end up getting screwed.

for instance, the first new years that i was able to go out i think i was 15 or 16. :yes: my friend dated this guy that was having a combined party with his older brother-his brother was in college. so we went there, they had a bar in the basement and all. go figure, there were 4 girls there and about 30 guys. :yes: i got so drunk-never drank before at a party and didn't know my limit-and the party had to be stopped because of me. the parents were upstairs the whole time, didn't even know that there were underage kids in the basement and flipped out on their kids. my mom was furious and she wanted to sue these people, BUT it was mostly my fault and luckily i talked her out of it. i should have ended up in the hospital, but i ended up in my room throwing up for a week. i learned my lesson after that one and i treated alcohol more maturely the next time i drank. i was always careful as to not drink too much, etc. after that, even though i was underage. we had a parent here in town that bought her kids and their friends alcohol for a hotel party for homecoming weekend. her face was all over the newspaper that weekend-how embarrassing! and they are a pretty well known family in town. so i do think that these parents buy their children the alcohol.

i don't think that being too strict will make your child climb out the window, sneak out, rebel against you..i did yes, BUT that's because i always thought my parents were wrong. now i know that they were right, lol, and i was the one that was wrong-so i think it has to do more with maturity than age. :yes: and you know that when you're a teen, everything is about you and you're the only one that's right! :hehe:

jen-see, either way, 15/16 year olds still drink here as much as they do there and STILL they're underage. so 18 isn't a suitable age for drinking and neither is 21. what about 16?! what are these kids thinking really?! i'm happy that it's 21 here, but it's not like our underage drinkers here are that much different than there in australia. no difference at all and i think that's a shame.

[lizisme]

Well it's actually against the law to supply a minor with alcohol, doesn't matter if you're their parent or not. And if you are hosting a party where underage kids are drinking YOU are responsible. The police can prosecute you.

The major problem here is that parents are not being parents, they are trying to be their kids friends. Wake up!! Kids don't need more friends, they have enough of their own. What they do need is guidance and boundaries, people they can respect and look up to. If the parents need friends they should maybe look for someone closer to their own age.

[lucyloo]

The major problem here is that parents are not being parents, they are trying to be their kids friends. Wake up!! Kids don't need more friends, they have enough of their own. What they do need is guidance and boundaries, people they can respect and look up to. If the parents need friends they should maybe look for someone closer to their own age.

Totally agree with you on this point. I think you have hit the nail on the head!!! (In my instance anyway)

[dragonfly97]

me too i also agree

[Telori]

Yeah I agree...and the kids dont need another friend. They need love and guidance and DISAPLINE...

Imagine what their kids are going to turn out like...it is so scarey...