Couple abandons IVF 'wrong sex' babies

[All for Women]

A BRITISH couple has reportedly abandoned IVF twin girls immediately after giving birth because they weren't boys.

Read More... (http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,23777134-2,00.html?from=public_rss)

[lucyloo]

How sad for these poor little girls, I hope they are adopted out to people who love them, and I hope the parents that had these girls, cannot have anymore babies.....:(

[Kekka]

Utterly disgusting.....they don't deserve children. They are too flippin' old anyway!

[Alexa]

I will never understand...so bloody sad.

[lizisme]

Can only agree - utterly bloody disgusting. I only hope that they cop a VERY hard time over this, that they're made to feel outcasts, that they're abandoned by society so they know how those poor little babies feel. Makes my blood boil.

[zen]

quote: Female babies are often abandoned and sometimes left for dead or killed in India by traditional families who only value male offspring.

this is obviously a cultural thing.. can we be so quick to condemn when we are not of the same culture?

on the other hand.. can this still be going on in India? this is appalling...

[Kekka]

Whether they like it or not.....they need females to keep the population going for their "precious" males!

[zen]

yes of course they do.. silly people...

[sandydee]

:blink:disgusting!:yes:dont bloody deserve any children!:uhno:soooo wrong.too old too.

[Naomi]

It seems like there should be more to the story. Why would they pursue IVF with the intention of having a boy, but not bother to use the technology to ensure they were only transferring male embryos ... or checking earlier in the pregnancy to determine the sex of the babies (I'm assuming if they are willing to dump newborns, then they'd probably be ok with terminating the pregnancy). I hope this story follows them where-ever they go to attempt to have further IVF and they are denied.

I cannot comprehend why someone would go through the invasive and not particularly pleasant experience of IVF, carry these babies and nurture them inside her for nine-ish months, then callously discard them after delivery. I really can't.

I hope the girls end up in a wonderful family, and are cherished and doted on. I hope they never have to hear how their biological parents treated them :(

Re the cultural thing ... it is also cultural in some countries to perform female circumcision, which is actually now illegal in most places. Sure, it might be cultural but it's also barbaric and inhumane.

[Rachel]

Shame on them :(

[Night Crawler]

I agree with Kekka. There is NO excuse to bring children into this world and then abandon them because they are not the sex you wanted. Their culture is not an acceptable excuse, but most especially since they are British citizens.

The abandonment and killing of children for the "crime" of being born female, along with "honour killings" by family members because some girl had the audacity to fall in love with someone of her own choice, or even to be caught talking to a boy, the beatings, burnings, imprisonments and murders of rape victims, total strangers having the perfect legal right to stone and beat a woman for showing any skin, even small amounts, ALL OF IT - IT'S CRAZY AND MUST STOP!!! I DO NOT CARE IF IT IS THEIR CULTURE. FRANKLY, I'M SICK TO DEATH OF PEOPLE HIDING BEHIND HERITAGE, OR RELIGION, OR TRADITION, OR WHATEVER TO COMMIT ATROCITIES ON WOMEN AND CHILDREN AND EXPECT THE REST OF TO STAND BY MEEKLY.

THERE IS A POINT WHEN WE ALL HAVE TO STAND UP AND SAY ENOUGH! YOU MAY NOT INDISCRIMINATELY BEAT, KILL OR ABANDON CHILDREN AND WOMEN! YOU MAY NOT MUTILATE THE GENITALS OF YOUNG GIRLS! YOU MAY NOT FURTHER VICTIMIZE RAPE VICTIMS. YOU MAY NOT TORTURE, THEN BUTCHER SOMEONE WHO JUST HAPPENS TO BE GAY! YOU MAY NOT DEPRIVE A LARGE PORTION OF HALF THE HUMAN RACE THEIR BASIC RIGHTS TO EDUCATION, HEALTH CARE AND PROTECTION OF THE LAW! IT MUST STOP! ALL OF IT MUST STOP!!!!

Sorry ladies, but I'm very passionate about the these things still happening in the space age! Religion and custom are no longer acceptable excuses, not in my book anyway! Hope I didn't offend anyone.

If anyone would like to read a true life story of a Muslim Somolian woman who lived through much of this type of abuse, pick up Infidel, by Ayaan Hirsh-Ali. It is her self-written autobiography and a tale about how she gained her freedom after escaping an arranged marriage. She went on to become a Dutch member of parliament, had a friend murdered in broad daylight because together they made a short film to show the abuses that many Muslim are still suffering from, and a note was stabbed to his body saying that she would be next. She now lives in the US for her own safety. Note that I say "SOME MUSLIM WOMEN" because it is true that not all Muslims are following what is currently seen in much of the world as the "true" path. Please believe I'm not out to offend anyone here. I just want the abuse and savagery to stop everywhere. Regardless or race, religion or geographic location!

[kezabelle]

Definitely passionate NC - but we all have to be about something :)

I was also wondering that Naomi.

Friends of mine (many years ago) were told they were having a girl... and then a boy popped out. They were both shocked and both went in to a depression (yes, fathers can have post-natal - or something similar) and found it almost impossible to bond with their son for the first couple of years. They then had a nother and found out it was a boy whilst still pregnant and again sufferered depression. I know many of you will find this appalling, etc, but they can't help their feelings. They did manage a girl for number 3 and (surprisingly) love all 3 kids equally (well, at least as far as can be seen). I haven't read the story (computer is going mad and being slow so I'm slack) but is it possible a similar thing has happened?

[Night Crawler]

:waves:Definitely passionate NC - but we all have to be about something :)

I was also wondering that Naomi.

Friends of mine (many years ago) were told they were having a girl... and then a boy popped out. They were both shocked and both went in to a depression (yes, fathers can have post-natal - or something similar) and found it almost impossible to bond with their son for the first couple of years. They then had a nother and found out it was a boy whilst still pregnant and again sufferered depression. I know many of you will find this appalling, etc, but they can't help their feelings. They did manage a girl for number 3 and (surprisingly) love all 3 kids equally (well, at least as far as can be seen). I haven't read the story (computer is going mad and being slow so I'm slack) but is it possible a similar thing has happened?

Oops, I got carried away again and my words did not come out quite the way I intended. Sorry. I have no problem with the type of scenario you are describing here. I myself am the long awaited girl after four "disappointments" with boys. Of course my parents love us all the same, but Dad had always wanted a girl, so each time a boy popped out, he got a bit depressed about it too.

Post-partam depression, or problems bonding for any number of reasons, worry about if to keep baby, as in can parent(s) support it, are they ready, age, and a zillion other reasons are normal and understandable. In such cases, people need help, compassion, understanding and options. It was just that the article read implied that once again baby girls were being valued about as much as garbage, and all due to a culture that seems stuck several hundred years in the past. I wouldn't dream of saying anything about perfectly normal reactions and feelings, good AND bad, when it comes to having and raising children. I'm certainly not an expert, and nor even a mother (at least not to humans), but I'm just so tired of female children always getting the short end of the stick the world over. Believe me, I know how lucky I am to have been born into a modern, free country with a widely diverse mix of cultures. It's in the normally in developing countries where most of the atrocities I referred to happen, but some are taking place in westernized countries, within certain portions of certain ethnic groups. Those are the cases that make me sick!

If the article was misleading and those babies were abandoned for other reasons, such as the parents advanced age, fear, or just about anything like that, then I could understand and sympathize. But if they left them as some result of a culture that leads them to believe the girls are worthless, then I'm furious - at the mind set, at the culture and at the parents themselves. If, however, they are afraid of how their families and community would react, and somehow felt they had no choice - that this was best chance for the babies - then I both applaud them for their courage in giving them and also feel deeply bad for them. But again, that would come back to the culture thing where women are basically incubators and property, and it's that which I cannot accept, and that which makes me furious. Hope that clarifies my position a bit better. Toodles for now! :)

[kezabelle]

I actually admire your passion NC, so don't feel you need to justify. I didn't read the article as my computer is being difficult and I just couldn't be bothered to wait (I'm going to need to reformat so until then... :)). I also agree that if the result are cultural then it is atrocious, but urely they ould have found out before conception or during pregnancy. The media often jumps on an incorrect bandwagon. At the end of the day though, I'm thinking - at least they gave them to a (possible) family that can love them unconditionally, rather than keep them and treat them badly.

[brunetteonamission]

OMG! What is the matter with some people?

In my experience people should be grateful with whatever they get!

Here's hoping the girls are adopted by a loving couple and they are worshipped for simply being the gorgeous girls they will be.

And I hope her future IVF attempts fail!!

[Cherie]

Obviously another couple that doesn't deserve to have any children.:D