Miserable

[kira_194]

Hi Girls, hope you can help.
I hate my job and most aspects of my life. I moved to Oz from UK 3 years ago after a v bad heartbreak. I was a teacher in the UK but unable to teach here for various reasons (basically I would have to go redo my whole education again) So I have been working in the corporate world for 3 years where I met my partner (been together 2 ½ years and have bought a house) I am nearly 30 not married, no kids (partner wants to wait until we have more money and pay more off the house) I hate going into work every day and the office politics. So I decided to go back to uni to do Nursing (wanted to do it before but mucked around at school and didn’t get the grades)I applied and got into the graduate entry course! (2 years)This involves a 6 week 40 hours intensive course in January and then I can work part time 3 days a week (my current company has already agreed to it) However my partner says I cannot do it, that we don’t have the money and will be going backwards in our savings (we have 40-50k saved up to do renos to the house) We would need to budge but he initially said it would work now he is saying no and that our dream to start a family may not even happen.
I am sick and tired of putting everyone else first and not making a difference to anyone – any advice is gratefully appreciated!

[Mad Old Cow]

Hello kira
It is hard to give advice on other peoples lives but i can tell you what I would do
I would do exactly what I wanted to do if that is what it would take to make me happy, life is very short & while your partner is happy doing what he wants (i take it that he is happy?) you should be allowed to do the same for yourself, is he still happy 100% in the partnership? maybe you need to ask him
Back in the days when my parents were young & even when I first got married 38 years ago women did more or less do things to please the man but this is a new world where most people tell themselves that they deserve to be happy whether you are man or woman.
Not sure if that makes sense but it did to me
Good luck & I really think you need to find out if the relationship is still 100% stable

[Cherie]

Hello Kira, Welcome to our forum. I know the girls here will be very supportive.
Firstly though, You say you are getting the money together to buy your house etc..That is very good. But..
If you have your heart set on becomming a nurse then your partner should be right behind you.
Has he asked you to marry him? If not, I cant see any reason for you to be following orders as such.
Like Di said, life is short.. Don't waste your life with regrets Kira..


PS:
My husband wanted to be a Vet when we first met, but because of his lack of schooling he never got to do what he loved. I told him we would work through it if he wanted to try for it, he was smart enough to do it, just never given the chance. He gave it up for me and our children.. He is so wonderful with animals and I sometimes feel sad when I see him working so hard now.

[LoveMyFamily]

I can't really give advice but it sounds like he is not being supportive. However, he might think it's more important to save than for you to do what you are wanting. Can you express how important this is for you? I cannot imagine being in a relationship where I was told no to the type of career I dream of.

[lucyloo]

Follow your heart Kira...become a nurse.

[Frannie]

Follow your heart Kira...become a nurse.

Ditto......

[old woman]

Hellp Kira, welcome to AFW

I agree with Moc,you need to tal to your partner to find out how much the relationship means to both of you.

If he really says no & means it & you split up, can you afford to stay in Australia by yourself & still go to uni whilst working part time?

Lot of questions to answer before you even think about having children. I wish you well in whatever you decide

[Heather]

Hi Kira, and welcome.

If you are so unhappy, why can't your partner see it?

[old woman]

Cos he's a man H, If we are not actually sobbing,we are fine & even if we are sobbing,it's not them, it's our hormones

[MissSmack]

I would chip away at the degree, one subject at a time, externally as much as possible and tell your husband to deal with it. xx