How-To Long Term Relationships

**Young.lass** · 25-02-2013 09:37 PM

I've just moved about 1200km away from my partner, having been in an 8 year relationship...and I have no idea how to go about making it work?! He seems to think that it automatically will, but I'm not so sure? Any tips on how to make a go of a relationship after being separated for the first time?

**Naomi** · 25-02-2013 09:48 PM

How often will you get to see each other?
How well do you communicate?
Is there an end-point to the separation?

It's not an exact parallel, but for a long time now my husband has travelled often and extensively for work. It's mostly ok now, we've worked through the difficulties but in the beginning it was awful, very nearly the worst point of our relationship.

Work hard on connecting as often as you can, email, texts, phone calls, Skype/facetime. Keep communicating.

**saphari** · 25-02-2013 10:07 PM

Hi Young Lass. I lived 2000ks from my partner for 8 mths and it wasnt nice. We use to fly to see each other but every night that we werent together we use to skype with a webcam. Made things much better but we knew it wasnt going to be for ever.. As Naomi says...is there an end to the separation??

**Sparkles** · 26-02-2013 08:57 AM

How old are you and do you have any children.

i think you can make it work if you want to.

good luck.

**Heather** · 26-02-2013 09:45 AM

Hi Young.lass....welcome to a world of feminine wisdom.

Many make long distance relationships work.....just keep the lines of communication open.

**Padfoot** · 26-02-2013 11:11 AM

As Naomi said, it all depends on how long-term the arrangement will be, how often you will see each other, how you will communicate in that time, and other factors such as personality types.

My uncle was away from my aunty for 2 years, he did a stint in WA while she stayed in Qld. It worked because they wrote often, saw each other for a 4 day block every 2 months (he had irregular time off, but every 2 months it was a solid 4 days) and she had her own interests. That was 1978 to 1980 and it was only a short time together. All the money he earnt in that time was portioned out so some went directly to the house, the rest to a fund put aside for retirement. Having a set time frame, monetary goals, direct contact, communication and individual hobbies kept them strong. My aunty worked so her money went on bills and food for just herself.

It paid off, they have a beautiful big Queenslander on a 1 acre block, a horse paddock, 2 nice cars, a large caravan and a nest egg that means he can retire early and travel the country.

That's a little story about a couple who successfully managed.